Smart People Use Online Dating Services.

Yes smart people do use online dating.

It doesn’t matter if you live in New York, Toronto, or Nanaimo nor does it
matter if you’re a Christian, Jew, or Muslim—online dating will work for
you as long as you use your brain.

Smart people use online dating services not to replace face-to-face dating
but to increase their selection of possible partners, to make specific demands
about who they are seeking, and to screen out unsuitable partners.

Let’s get to the benefits.

You Can Be Honest

People find it difficult to be open and honest with strangers but the vast
majority of dating situations are between strangers.

In face-to-face meetings people play by the social rules of conversation which, in the early stages, concentrate on small talk—probing questions are considered too personal. After weeks or even months of dates probing questions will be asked and it’s not uncommon, at that time, for people to discover that they’re not compatible. What a waste of time and money!

Aside: Get your FREE COPY of ‘Signals of Love’, great information on physical attraction and dating.

Of course not all people are good at small talk. These people go out on the
first date and have trouble saying anything. That’s embarressing for both people and leads to the end of any possible relationship.

Online dating avoids all of these early complications.

You can bypass the initial social niceties by posting your profile which allows you to state your main hopes, desires, and goals for a partner right up front–best of all these profiles maintain your anonymity!

This profile is what others see before they make any attempts to communicate with you. Unfortunately some people think that they can inflate, distort, or out right lie on their profile because of the anonymity. While that does happen these ‘game players’ will be caught. Catching them is easier with online dating because of the electronic nature of the communication—more on this shortly.

Also with online dating people can share emails, IMs (immediate messaging),
and even video discussions before they ever have to meet face-to-face. Once
they do meet they’ll have a ‘history’ together which always makes conversations more fluid, honest, and interesting—they won’t be strangers to each other.

If you’re smart you’ll be able to compose a profile that honestly reflects
your desires without being too restrictive. While you want to avoid the ‘frogs’
you don’t want to scare away the good ones. Profile writing will be covered
in another article.

Birds Of The Same Feather Flock Together

The vast majority of online dating services have three streams that members
can join under. Those streams are :long-term relationships, casual relationships, and alternative relationships.

This is a tremendous benefit as it takes away the guessing! I call that very
smart, healthy, time saving, and honest.

Convenience and Saving Money

Most people have spent hours joining clubs, going to dances, and heading out to night clubs looking for Mr or Miss Right.

Some people really enjoy that type of activity. There are just as many, if
not more, who do it simply because they don’t think they have a choice. The
time and the cost of such activities can be significant. Then you also have
to factor in all the noise, smells, and unwanted aggravations like poor service, fights, and police road blocks.

The convenience and cost savings of online dating are considerable.

Better Communications and Fact Finding

Woman can relate to this point more than men—no offense guys.

Emails and IMs are raw thought. The person has to sit in front of their keyboard, think of something to say, and then type it. Some people are horrible at writing emails because their thought processes are a mess, they can’t think clearly, and have little or no skill with the English language—not great signs if you’re looking for an intelligent partner.

Emails or IMs can be saved. This feature is priceless if you’re trying to spot
the liars.

By saving the emails and IMs you’ll have a history that you can review at your leisure. You can check to see if the person has given you inconsistent if not contradictory answers to the same or similar questions. If the person has given different answers or has actually contradicted themselves you can then ask for clarification or simply ‘dump’ the person and move on to the next.

More Selection

Depending on the dating service you select there can thousands of potential
partners for you to chose from.

Its extremely unlikely, in any non-virtual dating environment, to have such
extensive exposure to potential mates.Such a ‘bounty’ has it’s draw backs, the ‘horrible’ case of too many to chose from. But that’s why online dating services have profiles and streaming (mentioned above).

The short nature of the profiles means a person can review hundreds of potential partners very quickly and then do a short listing of the most promising ones. None of the people know that they have been examined therefore no ‘feathers are ruffled’.

Builds Confidence

Online dating can be a tremendous boost to a shy person’s confidence.

They can get lots of practice developing their communication skills.

Due to the anonymity the rejections that do occur will be less painful and
,as mentioned above, conversations can be reviewed and dissected to see where they went wrong.

Recommended Online Dating Services

I strongly recommend Lavalife, Date.com, and Match.com; you can see their links on this page.

Get your FREE COPY of ‘Signals of Love’, important information about the physical attraction.

By Alex G. Landels
Copyrighted 2009